Vissi Aldrei
by Sineluce Velius-Tristitia
Summary: "You did not deny that Harrison is not your true name." , "Why would I? Our name does not define us; it is merely something to be called by." One shot. TMR/HP. SEQUEL IS UP: Lanificus Orsa
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I still suck at making summaries… well anyway, school work is piling up lately especially since it is nearing the end of the school year. Those damned teachers think it amusing to pile up the work (because, damn, a 50 minute news report like CNN and then 9 different fucking articles each person?!) and now they're spouting off idiocy of… I won't even say it… though I am glad that the only exams left are the finals…**

**Disclaimer: Umm… are there wrong grammars in the book? No? Well, obviously, it isn't mine.**

**Warnings: My amazing grammar *sarcastic*, Slash. You don't like it? THEN DON'T FUCKING READ IT. NO ONE ASKED YOU TO. Oh, also, vague plot holes, if you ever see one. Unbetaed.**

**Pairings: TMR/HP**

**-HAPPY VALENTINE'S~!**

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**You're so quiet  
but it doesn't faze me**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

It has been a while since the last time Tom had seen anyone entertaining enough to hold his interest. Sure, Abraxas and Orion were quite entertaining, what with their constant bickering that always ended up with either of them hanging upside down in their dorms, but that's just it, _quite _entertaining. Just about fine to hold a bit of his attention but not wholly so.

That was one of the reasons why he kept on staring at the new student.

He didn't really know why but he felt drawn to him. Harrison. Just Harrison. Everything about him is plain from the way he dresses, up to his house. Even his past is plain.

The headmaster had one day just suddenly announced that they were to have a new student in their midst and that the student suffered from amnesia and therefore unable to recall anything other than his name. Harrison. Or something close to it.

It was not that uncommon that a student would transfer at Hogwarts at any time of the year since the war had just finished. It may have already been two years but people are still picking up pieces to bring back what once was.

At first, it was just out of politeness that he watched. He had gazed impassively as the old ratty sorting hat was placed on top of the messy mop of black hair that the new student carried. He waited along with the other students as the minutes passed by, the hat seeming to argue with Harrison, before the hat claimed the new student's house.

"sly- HUFFLEPUFF!"

No one noticed the hat's struggle as the new student stood up and handed the hat back to Dumbledore's waiting hands, the students of his house clapping loudly as they welcomed their new family. No one but Tom, that is.

He had watched as the new student – _Harrison –_ walked down looking for the whole world as if he was bashful and flustered but now that Tom knew that there is something else to this student, he watched more intently. And he was astonished as he continued his observations.

For one, Harrison does not carry himself at all as if he was in a new environment. In fact, he seemed so at ease, so _at home._ Then there was the scar on his forehead that he kept hiding unconsciously, ducking his head down every time his messy bangs so much as moved. His face might show shyness but his body language showed subtle confidence.

He was startled, however, when emerald green eyes snapped up and met his gaze.

Tom was sure that his observations were subtle enough that the other won't notice but it seems it wasn't. He frowned. Maybe he was losing his touch? His dark gaze shifted to his companions. No, even _they _haven't noticed he wasn't paying attention to any of their inane one-sided conversations. He looked over to the Hufflepuff table to see Harrison seemingly participate in a conversation but was just really nodding and smiling.

Tom blinked when the Hufflepuff nodded absently to the question thrown at him and met his gaze with half-lidded eyes as he sent a subtle smirk to him. Tom found himself returning the smirk.

_This would be an interesting year._

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**You're on time  
You move so fast, it makes me feel lazy**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

They had not met each other for a while. There was just no opportunity for Tom to use yet but when it did, he took it. He was not about to let an opportunity to solve a puzzle go. After all, his last name _is _Riddle, no matter how much he hated it.

It was Halloween and all the students are in the Great Hall for the feast but Tom did not feel like going into the noisy hall and he never had been fond of sweets. It was a good thing that his… allies respected his space. It also paid off that he is Head Boy.

He walked in the deserted corridors with no destination in mind until he stopped at the path to the Astronomy tower. He looked around to find whatever it is that caused him to pause and his gaze landed on a student sitting near the edge of the tower.

Normally, he would just leave them alone as it would be their fault if they ever fell and there was no need for him to be known to have been near the scene, but he found himself walking over and sitting beside the person.

"What are you doing here, Tom Riddle?"

Tom realized that it was Harrison. He shook himself mentally and looked at the person beside him.

Tom answered, "It is I who should be asking you that question."

Harrison shrugged. "I just felt like it."

Tom hummed and looked over the view. They were facing the Dark Forest and he can see the vague forms of the trees but it was too dark to see anything beyond them. They spent a few minutes just staring, basking in the silence and solitude being alone provided.

"You never said your name." Harrison did not even look at him.

"I would," Harrison let his feet dangle over the edge. "But it is Harrison you should know me by."

Tom snorted quietly through his nose. "You did not deny that Harrison is not you true name."

Harrison had a distant look on his face as he spoke, "Why would I? Our name does not define us; it is merely something to be called by." He was quiet for a while and Tom looked at him at the corner of his eyes. "They say that all of us have our true names but we never know it until our death. And death can be reached by not only when one's heart stops beating, but also when one stops living."

With that, Harrison stood up. Tom followed his lead.

"Do you know, then?" asked Tom.

Harrison sent him an empty smile that Tom just somehow wants to remove.

"I wish I had not."

"Regret?"

He was quiet for a while as he pondered the question.

"It is neither yes nor no." Harrison looked up and Tom didn't know what he was looking at but it seems to be something important. "I would not have been here if I somehow did."

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**Let's join forces  
We've got our guns and horses  
I know you've been burned  
But every fire is a lesson learned**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

Never had he felt so frustrated and it seemed that his companions were noticing this little change to him.

Tom narrowed his eyes as he lost track of Harrison again. He had been trying to be alone with the other for weeks now but it seemed the other was as good at disappearing as he is at masking his emotions. One second, Tom would find him walking alone in the corridor, and then another he would be gone.

His status as Head Boy had been useless as well since Harrison had all but disappeared from the radar, even from his own house mates' radar.

"Tom?"

Tom slid his gaze over to the blond beside him, face a mask of his usual impassiveness. Abraxas had been the first one to notice his little seeking game but thankfully hadn't said anything. Tom smirked inwardly. Not that the Malfoy heir would survive if he ever did that.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Are you feeling alright? You haven't been yourself these past days."

It was the fact that they were alone that he decided against… punishing the blond. Despite this, however, his dark eyes became steely, sending warning signs to Abraxas. Though the blond didn't seem to notice it, either that or he just chose to ignore it. He was of those few who seem to not actually mind serving him and giving him their loyalty, Tom mused.

"You can go back first to the common room. I forgot to ask Professor Slughorn about one of my essays." It wasn't a suggestion and Abraxas nodded. The blond then went to his way, passing Tom who had stopped.

Once Abraxas disappeared around a corner, Tom made his way up to the second floor and entered the girl's bathroom. He smirked as he remembered what had happened there. Poor little Myrtle was still haunting the chit Olive Hornby. Though he did frown when he remembered the Half-blood Hagrid. He had nothing against the boy; he was merely the most convenient scapegoat as he can't let Hogwarts shut down. He would have been stuck in that Merlin forsaken orphanage and with his education stunted; he would be unable to find a decent job that could be useful for his goals.

He looked around the bathroom to confirm that the ghost of Myrtle was not around before making his way over to the sinks. He then hissed for the passage to open and stepped away as he watched the sinks move to reveal a hole leading down. He sneered in disgust at the filth he could see inside the passage.

No matter, he hissed for stairs and watched as stairs appeared leading down further.

He started the trek towards the chamber of his ancestor, all the while musing about why he was walking down back to the chamber that had been the cause of the close call for Hogwarts to shut down. It couldn't have been for the Basilisk; it had been 2 years so why visit now?

Tom continued walking until he reached the chamber itself and was surprised to see another person there. As the shock died down, he became cautious and anger flared over him.

_No one was supposed to know about the chamber. No one should be able to enter aside from me._

His eyes narrowed as he eyed the stranger and opened his mouth to demand whoever had the audacity to enter his chamber. However, he was cut off by the stranger talking.

"This place is quite wonderful, isn't it?"

The stranger glanced over his shoulder and Tom saw who it was.

"Harrison." Tom said stoically some of his anger ebbing away as he realized that it was someone he knew wouldn't compromise anything about the chamber. He didn't know why, but he just _knew_. "May I ask why you are here?"

Harrison turned fully to him and his intense green gaze was laid upon him. After a silent moment where both of them examined each other, Harrison's gaze went back to exploring the chamber with underlying nostalgia, as if he had been there before.

"You could be here the entire day and no one would even be able to find you no matter where they look."

"You haven't answered my question."

A small sardonic smile made its way to Harrison's lips. "I merely wanted to be left alone. Don't you? Isn't that why you are here, despite not stepping into this place for a long time?"

Tom was silent for a while before it hit him. And his eyes briefly glowed red in anger before returning back to their usual dark color.

"How did you know I have been here before? How did you even know about this place?"

He should have cursed this person right now, should have done it before, but something was stopping him; something was telling him that it wasn't a good idea to attack the teen. And that angered him more.

Harrison merely smiled that small bitter smile of his that he always seems to carry whenever Tom set his sights on him.

"I merely wanted to answer some questions myself; to be able to finally find out why. Nothing really matters right now-"Harrison turned around to face the statue of his ancestor. "It doesn't really matter if someone falls because I have seen and done it a lot of times. And the whys had always been there.

Why did he die? Why did I have to do something about it? Why should I help? Why _did _I help? Why kill them? Why do I have to suffer? Why did I have to live? _Why me?_"

Tom stared as the boy sat down by the statue's feet and leaned his head on the statue, eyes shut tight.

"All I really wanted was to be left alone, and now I may have it, but I'm already beyond caring. Why now? Why not when I needed it? Why not when _they _were still a part of my miserable life? Maybe then, I wouldn't have been here…"

Tom grits his teeth. "You want to die?"

Tom knew. He knew there were people out there who wanted to die; he himself had considered it before. But now, now he had his goals he had set so he would never consider it again. Never consider death again. Because he hated death; hated how it made people useless and _dead_.

"Death would very much be welcome." Agreed the boy.

Tom didn't know why, didn't know what made him do it—maybe it was because he understood, or because it was just so stupid, but he knew it all too well, and he hated that he ever understood—but he only noticed as he felt the impact to his fist. He had punched Harrison on the face.

Harrison fell on his back as Tom punched him and he only blinked before sitting up and staring at Tom.

"I never pegged you for someone who would punch someone." Was the Hufflepuff's only response.

Tom glared at the other boy and watched as a red mark formed on the boy's cheek.

"Those who wish for death are weak."_ Because they can't handle whatever the world threw at them._ Tom held out his hand in silent assistance for him to stand up. He would help, even if it was out of character; even if he didn't know what help he would give. And he was surprised with himself. He _never _helped unless he would gain something.

Harrison blinked and a small _true _smile brushed his lips; not those quirks of his mouth, those smirks his face supports most of the time he wasn't using that bitter smile of his. "But then, there are those who would be stronger with death."

Harrison accepted the offered hand and stood up.

"Harrison Potter-Evans."

Tom nodded. "Tom Marvolo Riddle."

Harrison smiled at him. "Nice to meet you."

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**I left my house  
Left my clothes  
Door wide open  
Heaven knows  
you're so worth it, you are**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

Since Tom had offered his help, Harrison – or Harry as he preferred to be called but Tom refused to call him something so plebian, same as Harrison insisted on calling him Marvolo instead of Tom – had tagged along with him, giving quip remarks to Abraxas and the others whenever Tom did not look interested in talking, successfully drawing their attention to him so Tom didn't have to reply, however absentmindedly.

Malfoy, Black, and Rosier took Harrison in stride ever since he started following Tom around, though Orion Black kept sending both Tom and Harrison dubious glances whenever they talked easily. Well, considering that Tom, the same Tom who is cold to others outside his house, is exchanging remarks (_not bantering_) with someone outside their house, more so that Harrison is a Hufflepuff, it is bound to raise some eyebrows.

Although Tom knew better. Harrison was a Slytherin, the other said so himself that the Sorting Hat _was _supposed to say Slytherin but he didn't want attention, though that was shot away once he started talking with Tom in a public setting – Tom still wondered how Harrison was able to _persuade, _as he said, an ancient relic to not sort him to his right house.

Now that he thought of it, Harrison was a Potter. He didn't know exactly why but he knew Harrison is a Potter and he never denied it anyway. Illegitimate child, maybe? Though he doubted that. He suspected that there's a different answer to that, a more complex answer, and he would find out why. Questioning other purebloods had been a failure since Abraxas Malfoy had only ever heard of one Potter child. Besides, no one, other than Tom, knew about Harrison not only remembering his whole name, but his memories as well.

"Good morning, Marvolo."

Tom didn't even react as Harrison suddenly spoke up beside him. He had already gotten used to this as it was Harrison's favorite way of greeting, especially to Lestrange as the other still held some kind of animosity towards the Hufflepuff.

"Good morning, Harrison."

They walked on in silence and were soon joined by Malfoy, Black, Rosier, Avery, and lastly, Lestrange. They made small talk and, as per usual, Harrison would answer for Tom while the others not noticing what he was doing and Tom looked on in amusement as Harrison verbally shot down Lestrange when the other started an argument.

"Lestrange, if you ever manage to enter the ministry, I doubt that anyone here would care, especially if we all know how much you lack in the… intellectual side of things." Harrison was saying.

Lestrange – Tom always forgot what his first name was – flushed red in anger and he sneered down at Harrison. "Shut up mudblood. As if you can do better than me. Filth like you deserves to be slaves working for us, purebloods. Though I doubt you would be of much use than for… pleasure."

Now that was going too far. Tom was glaring coldly at Lestrange as he finished his tirade, though he was not that offended as he could make anyone who ever thought of him as that suffer. He glanced over at Harrison to see if he should punish Lestrange for this but was slightly taken aback at the icy glare Harrison was supporting. His body was calm though it held warning and Tom was impressed to say the least as Harrison looked rather terrifying since he was smiling as his poisonous green eyes glared harshly.

"Lestrange," Harrison started in a condescending tone as Lestrange didn't seem to notice the change, though Abraxas and the others did and were now subtly backing away from Lestrange. "Didn't you know that if you found… pleasure from those you considered filth, then that would make you filth as well? I can't believe that you would… lower yourself so much just to find pleasure." Harrison was now walking towards Lestrange and soon enough, he was touching his cheek teasingly mocking. "Is it because you fail to find what you seek in your pedestal; unable to reach it so you just turn and lower yourself?"

Tom felt, more than saw, Harrison cast wards around their perimeter to prevent anyone from ever finding them.

And then, Lestrange was screaming.

Tom didn't know how long it continued like that as he watched Lestrange clawing at his skin wherever Harrison touched him. He knew that it wasn't anything from the Dark Arts because it would attract the attention of the Headmaster. No, it was Light. But he could see that it was causing much more damage than the Cruciatus could because of the shame that came with whatever Harrison was doing. Because Lestrange had called Harrison filth, the Hufflepuff made it so that his touch could cause pain.

Harrison smiled sweetly as he stood up from his crouching position when he was touching Lestrange's face. "Now, now. As you can see… your body repulses my touch as well. Maybe you won't touch… filth, as you had put it, from now on. After all, what could happen if you ever did _that _to filth?"

With that, Harrison made his way beside Tom and smiled brightly at him. "He'll be fine." He said it as if Lestrange's face wasn't a bloody mess, and it was because of him.

"I am thankful." Tom drawled sarcastically.

Harrison waved his wand and the wards were removed. Then his expression changed from satisfaction to worry when a student finally passed to the corridor they were in.

"L-Lestrange, oh Merlin, what happened? I'm so sorry," Harrison said with faux worry coating his voice as the student was close enough. "Let' get you to the Hospital wing…" He reached down his hand but Lestrange flinched from his hand. Harrison had a look of distress on his face and he looked at the student that was now looking at Lestrange as well.

"Wh-What happened to him?" The student asked.

"I don't- maybe it was the itching powder? I just bumped into him and I was holding a pack of opened itching powder…" Harrison trailed off and he looked at Tom. "Marvolo, can you help me a bit?"

Tom concealed his amusement and nodded. Harrison stunned Lestrange who was still scratching along his skin and whimpering hoarsely. Tom levitated the limp body and walked ahead to go to the Hospital wing, leaving the others who were still in a bit of shock.

Tom heard Harrison chuckle beside him. "So gullible…"

Tom raised an eyebrow as they turned a corner, purposefully bumping Lestrange harshly on the wall. "Itching powder… really?"

"It _is _itching powder… though a bit different."

"How were you not affected by it, then?"

"Ever heard of gloves Mr. Riddle?" Harrison held out his glove covered hands that were now visible.

"Ah, effective use of the disillusionment charm," Tom looked closely only to avert his gaze. "And Notice-me-not, it seems."

Harrison merely chuckled.

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**But I wish I could feel it all for you  
I wish I could be it all for you  
If I could erase the pain  
Maybe you'd feel the same  
I'd do it all for you  
I would**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

"You never did say why you are… _here_."

Harrison didn't say anything, only sitting at the edge of the Astronomy Tower with his legs dangling off the edge. Tom waited patiently for the answer as he knew that Harrison would answer when he wanted to. He wouldn't lie about anything, only twisting it so it would be perceived very differently by other people… but if you waited, he would tell the truth. Tom learned this himself.

It was a couple of minutes before Harrison opened his mouth to answer.

"You."

It was said so bluntly that Tom was close to doubting if it was true but he knew it was the truth. But it was still hard to believe.

"Me?"

Harrison rolled his eyes and looked directly at Tom. "Yes,you. You are the main reason why I am here."

"What do you-"He was cut off by Harrison, making him annoyed.

"Did you know that Time is actually flowing freely, not set in stone?"

Tom pondered this for a minute before it dawned on him. "Time travel? But, that is impossible."

"For a few hours it is, though I don't think that was meant to be public knowledge yet. The Department of Mysteries had found mystical sand that could make it possible to go back in time. Give it a few years and they'll be giving it to important people."

"So you're from, what? Tomorrow?"

"That doesn't even make any sense, Marvolo." Harrison deadpanned. "But yeah, Time travel. You know, it was actually an accident that sent me here. I didn't know what I am going to do. And then I remembered you're here, so, why not? My mere presence here can already cause a Paradox so why not mess it up completely? It would have done a lot of good for the future."

Tom just stared. He didn't know whether to feel betrayed or not. But he could practically feel Harrison's nervousness. He was telling the truth and hoping that nothing would change between them. The heaviness of Harrison's situation is quite palpable now that he knew what he was missing and even though he wanted to—and he _could_—use whatever information Harrison held, no matter how important it may be, he won't.

"Because the future is not definite…" muttered Tom.

Harrison smiled. "My time, _my world, _doesn't exist anymore now that I am here. Everything I have known, my past, doesn't even exist anymore." His gaze went back to the dark sky. There weren't any stars visible, Tom noted as he too gazed up. "You're the only proof that I even existed, that my memories were real."

Tom found himself surprised at this and he looked at the other. He absently noticed that his reactions were far different from what he would have done before. He had, dare he say it, changed.

"You are still Voldemort, are you not?" Tom flinched and a spark of anger spiked through him but it slowly disappeared as Harrison was looking at him almost pleadingly. "You still killed your father, still unleashed the Basilisk and killed Myrtle, still the Tom or Voldemort that created Horcruxes? The one who grew up hated by his peers in an orphanage?"

Tom knew he should be angry, should kill Harrison now for just simply knowing all of those, but he didn't. There should have been fear. Fear that someone knew about his Horcruxes. But there isn't. How could he when he saw Harrison's broken smile? The well and truly _broken _smile, desperate for the answer, desperate to find what it believes to be the answer for closure. Tom knew how brittle that smile could be, he saw it from the orphanage enough to know that it is easily broken.

So, Tom nodded and watched as Harrison let go of everything and cried.

He hated how crying made Harrison look weak, but he hated the fact that Harrison was crying even more. Tom tentatively reached out to him and when Harrison didn't move away, he pats his head and slowly pulled the Hufflepuff towards him. He ran his hand through the messy locks in an awkward attempt in comfort.

Tom knew he changed ever since he met Harrison, if it was for the better or for the worse, he didn't know nor did he care. What matters is that he met Harrison, and Harrison changed him. He may not know anything much about the other, but Harrison felt that he was the only one that was left, and Tom thought back to the day he first talked to Harrison.

"Do you now have a definite answer?" Tom asked when the sobbing stopped. Harrison sniffed a bit but didn't move from their position, neither did Tom.

"About the regrets?"

"Yes."

"No, I didn't have any regrets." Harrison said. "Until now, I don't. I wouldn't have met you, and no one else would have been able to help me."

Tom just smiled—he was surprised, as he never did smile before.

_But wasn't it you who really helped me? I may still be Voldemort… but the cold bitterness isn't within reach anymore._

Harrison started humming and soon enough, he sang softly, barely above a whisper, but Tom could hear it clearly and Tom found it quite beautiful.

"_Let's tie words  
'Cause they amount to nothing  
Play it down  
Pretend you can't take what you've found  
But you found me  
On a screen you sit at permanently_

I left my house  
Left my clothes  
Door wide open  
Heaven knows  
You're so worth it, you are

But I wish I could feel it all for you  
I wish I could be it all for you  
If I could erase the pain  
Maybe you'd feel the same  
I'd do it all for you  
I would…"

Tom looked down on Harrison as the song the other was singing faded. Harrison suddenly chuckled.

Tom smiled and bent down. He used his hand to raise the other's head, and slowly, he lightly pressed his lips against Harriso—_Harry's. _He pulled back and chuckled at the shock coloring the other boy's face.

"It is rather fitting."

This snapped Harry out of his shock and suddenly, a blush bloomed on his cheeks and he ducked down self-consciously.

Tom chuckled again. He may be Voldemort—_cruel, ruthless, vicious, heartless_—but he still knew how to care, maybe not love, but he still knew how to give mercy, compassion, concern… he's still capable of all of those, but it's close enough, isn't it?

He looked down again and his chuckle turned into laughter as Harry sputtered. He leaned down again, and pressed their lips once more, effectively shutting him up.

_I may never know what would have happened if I never met you, but it doesn't matter now that you are here. It won't ever happen; I won't let it happen if it would lead to breaking you._

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

_**It's time to come clean  
And make sense of everything  
It's time that we found out who we are  
Cause when I'm standing here in the dark  
I see your face in every star**_

_**But I wish I could feel it all for you**_  
_**I wish I could be it all for you**_  
_**If I could erase the pain**_  
_**Maybe you'd feel the same**_  
_**I'd do it all for you**_  
_**I would**_  
_**I'd do it all for you, I'd do it all for you**_

:::…~~~-0-~~~…:::

**A/N: FUFUFUFU! I'm quite proud that I managed to finish this. Kind of late but I wish everyone a Happy Valentine's day~! Technically, I celebrated Valentine's writing this and it's soooo worth it.**

**Song: Guns and Horses by Ellie Goulding**

**Title meaning: Vissi Aldrei (Never Knew) -Icelandic**


	2. Sequel is up

**Oh, would you look at that... I'm writing a sequel. How surprising... even for me, really.**

**Aaaanndd... it's published. Lanificus Orsa is up, people.**


End file.
